Movie Review: Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead

I would like to preface this review by saying I never expected Dead Snow to be a good movie. Something I do to relax and calm my nerves is watch a bad movie and hate on it, which Netflix is the perfect avenue for. I brought up a zombie movie I did not expect to be good. Dead Snow was a rare exception on Netflix, at least these days. It was a truly good film.

Good, not great. Looking back on it and skimming over the review I did for Dead Snow, something I continually hammered on was director Tommy Wirkola’s lack of direction and the film’s immobility for most of the first half. There was some suspense and there was a little pull on me to stick with it but I think that yank may have been my want to see a movie at the time, not Wirkola.

However, I’ve seen Dead Snow twice which means it has some draw to it and I think that draw is that it’s too fun of a movie to not show your friends. It drags, it can be incompetent material at times and it’s certainly not to be taken seriously but it adequately meets the standard of fun.

So I was pumped for Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead. Despite its flaws as a film, I have fond memories of Dead Snow and while I had no idea how the film’s story would transition into a sequel, this was a film I was okay with having a sequel. There are so many sequels these days that are made purely for the dough and not for the story. This was a film that was made for the fun it gave the crew that made it and the fans who watched it. It only made $1.9 million at the box office.

Yes, Dead Snow is a foreign film, made in Norway so you should probably take that into consideration but I applaud the efforts. Money was not the top goal here and I truly appreciate that. Nice to see we’re not all obsessed with gold like those Nazi zombies.

Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead was a blast and carried so much more weight for me than its predecessor.

For one, Wirkola decided to loosen the reins on this script and just let it flow. The way the dialogue was written, I don’t think Wirkola needed to do much here. Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead is more comedy than any zombie movie I’ve seen, including Zombieland. This movie is a gut-buster in more ways than one. Dark humor is a mainstay. Wirkola loves having people lose their intestines so enjoy some of that. Like for real, I think there’s an intestine obsession going on here.

The costumes and visual effects took a step up as did the tempo and entertainment value.

The plot is out there and it’s a go-with-it element. If you’ve been reading this for a while, you know I hate go-with-it elements but when utilized in comedies, it doesn’t bug me as much. Yes, this story is pretty ridiculous on quite a few levels but if you’re willing to accept them for what they are, you can have a real jump.

The comedy writing is phenomenal and the actors do a pretty good job of dropping their lines into our greedy, give-me-more hands. With that said, this film isn’t all a party. Action sequences are taken seriously even if some of the kills in this film are exceedingly preposterous. Not saying some of these kills would or would not happen but the creativity this film offers with our zombie-executions is remarkable. It kept me laughing the whole way through.

The amount of time these actors invested into this film can be demonstrated not by their performances but by the way they handle these roles. The timing is perfect. No joke fell flat. If anything, it felt like each one was on an escalator. After each one, we found ourselves holding our breath in anticipation of the next one. Then the dominoes of our self-control would come crumbling down after yet another brilliantly-executed gag.

Yet, there was something that Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead was missing and it took me a couple minutes following the film to realize what it was. What Wirkola’s sequel is missing is not uncommon. Nearly every comedy I watch is missing it because when screenwriters go to the drawing board, this isn’t the first, second or third thing that comes to their minds. The thing that’s missing is a takeaway, a life lesson.

A quick example of what I mean by life lesson can be demonstrated in a speech in Step Brothers.

At the infamous Catalina Wine Mixer, we get a speech that indirectly says, grow up, but never forget your childhood. I’m talking about the “don’t lose your dinosaur” speech.

If you haven’t seen Step Brothers yet, shame on you sir/madam. Shame on you.

Basically, the whole reason Step Brothers gets so many points from me (I haven’t written a review on this yet but when I do, I think my score will surprise you) is because it understood that life can’t be all about laughs. It isn’t. That’s not how life works. Life gets serious more often than it gets funny and while we watch comedies to distract us from the stresses of our lives, we need to be given some confidence as well, something that gives us that boost of motivation to want to go back out there and weather the storm. Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead is missing that.

Once again, if you’re new to my blog, I’ve always ranked movies on a scale of 0-100 (I don’t know why, I just always have). Here’s the grading scale.  

90-100  It’s a great movie and definitely one worth buying. (American Beauty, Gone Girl, Mulan, Guardians of the Galaxy, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes)

80-89   It was a pretty good movie and definitely one worth seeing, but it doesn’t quite scratch my top ten percentile. (The Cable Guy, The Cabin in the Woods, Tears of the Sun, Edge of Tomorrow, The Amazing Spider-Man 2)

70-79   It’s okay but I’ve seen better. It has its moments, but it has its flaws, too.(Snowpiercer, The Family, When the Game Stands Tall, Black Hawk Down, Red Dawn(2012))

60-69   It’s got plenty wrong with it but I still got enjoyment out of this one. (Twisted, Parker, House at the End of the Street, The Raven, Dead Snow)

50-59   This movie isn’t intolerable but it’s not blowing my mind either. I’m trying really hard to get some sort of enjoyment out of this. (Rage, Zoolander, The Expendables 3, Homefront, G.I. Joe: Retaliation)

40-49   This movie is just mediocre. It’s not doing anything other than the bare minimal, so morbidly boring that sometimes I’m actually angry I watched this. (Erased, I, Frankenstein, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Billy Madison)

30-39   Definitely worse than mediocre, the 30′s ironically define the 1930′s, full of depression, lack of accomplishments, poverty and just so dumb. (Centurion, Planet of the Apes, Stonados, Redemption, Pride and Prejudice)

20-29   What did I just watch? Cliches, stupidity, nothingness, did I mention stupidity? Just…wow. (The Colony, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, The Grey, X-Men: Days of Future Past, Thor: The Dark World)

0-19      Watching this movie resulted in one or more of the following: seizure, loss of brain cells, falling asleep/unconsciousness, feel you wasted your time/day, accomplished nothing for you, left the movie knowing less about it then you did going into it, constantly asking yourself why you came to see this movie, or near-death experience. In short, staring at a wall was just as entertaining as watching this movie. This movie deserved a sticker or a label that said, “WARNING: EXTREME AMOUNT OF SUCKAGE.” (Sabotage, Gallowwalkers, Tucker & Dale vs. Evil, Safe, Watchmen)

My score for Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead: 72.

You’ll find brand new fire in this installment and it’s a jolly good time but absence of the reflection element, as well as any real character depth, does make this a journey without a compass. Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead still comes highly recommended from me. It is sure to tickle your funny bone at some point.

Movie Review: Dead Snow

I can’t remember who but someone in the WordPress blogging community recommended this film. I love The Walking Dead so when it comes to zombies, count me in.

It’s about a few Norwegian medical students going to a cabin in the mountains during Easter break. Everything is said in Norwegian so expect subtitles. I myself am not a fan. Movies are supposed to be a form of entertainment both visual and auditory. When dialogue cannot be understood by your audience and you have to revert to subtitles, I’m doing a lot of reading and not a lot of listening, which provides the overall feel of reading a picture book rather than watching a film. This is one of the disconnects foreign films burdens American audiences with. It’s not intentional. It’s part of the language barrier.

Tommy Wirkola’s direction for the first half is aimless at best. He has his proponents sit around a cabin and engage in pointless conversation to waste time. It’s a bunch of guys and gals hanging around in a chilly cabin, drinking and relaxing. I got it. I don’t need to be beaten over the head with it.

For the majority of Dead Snow‘s first 45 minutes, Wirkola panders and erases at the drawing board while letting the tape roll. A film already short at 91 minutes, Wirkola’s poor decision-making makes Dead Snow more like a 46-minute short, if you have the patience to get that far. The script is far too nonchalant to stir interest. It doesn’t want to go anywhere. It’s like when you have to go somewhere and the car is in front of you, but instead of getting in the car and getting on your way, you sit down and fiddle with your keys. It doesn’t make sense.

The most persistent viewer will struggle to stay connected to the material. The audience’s desire to stick around would have been strengthened had they been teased of the quality Dead Snow had the potential to exhibit. However, when you watch a film for the first time and the opening half of the skit is mediocre at best, you can’t be criticized for turning it off. If you ate half of a pie and it was rotten, it makes no sense to eat the rest of it, even if the baker has assured you that is the good part. Rather than eat the rest, you’re more likely to ask, “Why couldn’t it have all been the good part?”

Desultory is probably the best adjective to describe Wirkola’s 2009 escapade: lacking in consistency, constancy or visible order, disconnected. Inconsistency is a glaring blight on the zombie flick and it’s very unorganized. The story follows a logical trajectory but the entertainment value doesn’t. Wirkola’s pacing is off, especially considering this is a horror story. Where are the zombies? Where’s the suspense? Where’s the gore and laughs?

There’s no tension. The want to see what happens next is minimal. For a sub-genre that is usually described as gory and adrenaline-filled, Dead Snow if far too dead (haha) to elicit any cares from me.

Then Dead Snow got lively at the halfway point. Our protagonists stopped making the stereotypical, predictable decisions that infuriate viewers and started making the smart, survivalist decisions they should have made a long time ago. These people still aren’t bright. They make other choices that result in their demise but at least Dead Snow improved.

Dark comedy and gutsy kills (pun) are displayed in favor of character development that never gave anything more than a perfunctory effort. I’ll give credit to the make-up artists for attempting zombie originality but you got to do better than gray spray paint and some loose flesh to impress me. The Walking Dead is showing you up!

Once again, if you’re new to my blog, I’ve always ranked movies on a scale of 0-100 (I don’t know why, I just always have). Here’s the grading scale.  

90-100  It’s a great movie and definitely one worth buying. (Mulan, Guardians of the Galaxy, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, Transformers: Age of Extinction, Jack Reacher)

80-89   It was a pretty good movie and definitely one worth seeing, but it doesn’t quite scratch my top ten percentile. (The Cabin in the Woods, Tears of the Sun, Edge of Tomorrow, The Amazing Spider-Man 2, Young Guns)

70-79   It’s okay but I’ve seen better. It has its moments, but it has its flaws, too.(When the Game Stands Tall, Black Hawk Down, Red Dawn(2012), Maleficent, Rise of the Planet of the Apes)

60-69   It’s got plenty wrong with it but I still got enjoyment out of this one. (Rubber, Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy, The Transporter, Speed)

50-59   This movie isn’t intolerable but it’s not blowing my mind either. I’m trying really hard to get some sort of enjoyment out of this. (The Expendable 3, Homefront, G.I. Joe: Retaliation, Vantage Point, The Starving Games)

40-49   This movie is just mediocre. It’s not doing anything other than the bare minimal, so morbidly boring that sometimes I’m actually angry I watched this. (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Billy Madison, A Haunted House, 300: Rise of an Empire, Cowboys and Aliens)

30-39   Definitely worse than mediocre, the 30′s ironically define the 1930′s, full of depression, lack of accomplishments, poverty and just so dumb. (Centurion, Planet of the Apes, Stonados, Redemption, Pride and Prejudice)

20-29   What did I just watch? Cliches, stupidity, nothingness, did I mention stupidity? Just…wow. (The Grey, X-Men: Days of Future Past, Thor: The Dark World, The Sum of All Fears)

0-19      Watching this movie resulted in one or more of the following: seizure, loss of brain cells, falling asleep/unconsciousness, feel you wasted your time/day, accomplished nothing for you, left the movie knowing less about it then you did going into it, constantly asking yourself why you came to see this movie, or near-death experience. In short, staring at a wall was just as entertaining as watching this movie. This movie deserved a sticker or a label that said, “WARNING: EXTREME AMOUNT OF SUCKAGE.” (Gallowwalkers, Tucker & Dale vs. Evil, Safe, Watchmen, Clash of the Titans)

My score for Dead Snow: 61.

Dead Snow is half a film, so it gets half a score. The final third ascends it to the 60’s but just barely so.