Category Archives: Poetry/Music

Where Are You?

I sense you every day

Sneak a peek at every smile, knowing it might be yours.

I can feel your auburn hair brush past, watch as it flows behind you, riding along the speed of your step.

You always have a place to be.

I just wish I was one of them.

Your laugh, that splendid melody, that joyous sound.

I rehearse it in my head daily

‘fraid I’ll lose it like I’ve lost everything else.

If happiness was a sound, it would be you.

I sense you in the brisk wind when I run, your sweet voice softly in my ear

“Don’t quit on me.”

I imagine your fingers under my chin, reminding me to keep my head up

Your hand on the back of my neck, a rush in my shoulders

A soft, glacier blue in your eyes

A blizzard that goes right through me.

There is a snow-covered paradise in there

A whirlwind, an oasis.

They’re mesmerizing.

There’s no shade of color which can command like that.

They go right through me.

I can’t hide from you

And I don’t want to.

I remember the wit of someone I’ve never met

Deja vu.

Clever, sharp and whimsical

Endlessly endearing, a passion unmatched.

You are my North Star, my compass

My guide, my love.

I know everything about you

And also nothing at all.

I long for sweet nothings in my ear

But I hear only emptiness

An echo chamber of my own making.

I pain for luscious key strokes from the parlor

To see the Steinway roar by your hand.

You create in ways I can only dream of.

I try to find the path

But it evades me, as you do.

I yearn for the blossoms to bloom.

I never had a green thumb.

The American red maple stands strong year after year

Stubborn, patient and reliable as me.

We’ve gone through a lot of seasons together

That tree and I.

But I cannot grow a flower.

You are my rose.

I feed the deer every day.

I know how much of a Snow White you are.

Each time he comes around, I ask Jack if he’s seen you.

He looks up from his grub and in his eyes I see the same trust and faith I see in yours.

He has no answers for me.

Jack is a deer.

I’m asking a deer if he’s seen my wife.

Each night, I look up in the sky for you.

You’re always there, the one place I know you’ll be.

I wonder if you dwell in the stars in the twilight

Looking for me

Or if all I do

All I feel

And all I dream

Is a wisp of a life I wished I’d lived

And something that will never be.

Sincerely,

Yours Truly

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Run In The Sun

It’s hot.

The Florida sun has never been kind to me.

I think God wants to remind me of the burn for later.

I run along the beach all the same. I run until I can’t feel my legs.

It’s a surreal feeling, not having any lower extremities.

Down

Up

Down

Up

Simply cogs in a machine, they are. They’ve been given simple orders and will continue to do so until they can no longer.

I’m just racing. Time is winning. Always does, it seems. Think it’s fixed but I’ve never been one to quit easily.

It’s at this point that life slows down for me.

Her grasp is digging into my shoulders.

Comforting cause I feel it, painful because I know it’s not real.

If it was, I’d feel the prick of her nails, the feline she is.

The ocean breeze is sweeping salt into my face like an obsessive housemaid

But all I can smell are the roses and my lady’s perfume.

It smells of cinnamon apple, or maybe a citrus blend.

When she’s trying to be fancy she goes to lavender.

Sometimes she’ll throw something lavish on when she’s trying to be naughty.

I can’t help but grin.

Rarely on the outside but always on the inside.

Got to play along with the facade.

Have to play hard to get.

Must keep the mask on to hide what’s underneath.

I’ve tossed my shades to the side but everything demonstrates clarity

The colors blurred into an artistic spread.

Blues like a clean river, sunsets like marigolds

Vivid splendor.

Right now, it’s just me and her.

My brain shuts off with her hands in my hair.

She knows my thoughts, mine hers

Our heads together.

In that moment, I feel…

Fulfilled.

Evolved.

Transcendent.

 

But it’s just a memory

A shutter from something invisible to me

Because she’s not there.

I’m alone and racing

Pacing about the dance floor with my arms outstretched for someone who’s never showed

And curtain call seems to get closer by the day.

I practice religiously

Obsessively glancing through a window to a courtyard where I know she won’t appear.

Looking through faces on my way back home, looking for my mademoiselle.

I’d recognize that glance for sure. I’d only need a glimpse.

But no.

Not today.

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Or next week.

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Or next month.

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Or next year.

Maybe never

And the idea that’s even remotely possible puts me in a malaise.

She can make my world.

She, without knowing, can put it in a standstill.

Time stops for her

Perspective revolves around her.

And so on I run

Run with fire in my lungs

Charging ahead, looking for my Belle.

Maybe she’s on the edge of the world

Waiting for me

Just over this sandbar

Or maybe the next wave.

I know when I find her

The world will slow.

Seconds will feel like hours.

I’ll have a greater understanding of everything.

Beauty has a way of doing that.

Sincerely,

Yours Truly

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